Booty Basics: Prostate 101
We love talking about the prostate – aka the P-spot – for many reasons. Especially since regular stimulation of it can provide a two-for one, offering tons of pleasure—and it can be good for prostate health! Yet many people still haven’t made the acquaintance of their own (or a partner’s) prostate. So, allow us to introduce you!
The prostate is sometimes referred to as the “male” g-spot (though no need to gender it because folks of all genders can have prostates) because of its association with providing intense orgasms, and that’s much more than a coincidence. The prostata femina, a.k.a the g-spot, develops from the same tissue as the prostate. As far as pleasure is concerned, they function basically the same way!
The prostate gland is located just under the bladder and is wrapped around the urethra - you can’t touch it directly, but you can stimulate it through the front wall of the anal canal with pressure or vibration.
When it comes to anal play, when the body and mind are at ease, the muscles around the anus begin to relax. And since the anus doesn’t self lubricate, you’re gonna need to keep some lube handy to keep things comfortable.
Start by making sure the person with the anus is interested in exploring it! Arousal will naturally aid in relaxation and pleasurable anticipation. Try adding in some play with the genitals, or start the arousal right at the bootyhole. Gently massage the anus with the flat pad of your well-lubricated finger. As the sphincter muscles relax you can actually see the anus move outward, it almost looks like it’s blowing a little kiss! Let the massage evolve into a gentle glide inward – gentle and slow, tip in, don’t poke.
When the booty is ready for a full finger or two, lube up even more and gently slide about two inches in (it could be further for some bodies). Curve it toward the belly, aiming towards that front wall of the anal canal – just beyond lies the prostate. This is why many prostate toys often are shorter and curved vs long and straight (see below).
Pro(state) Tip: In addition to making sure your hands are well groomed and/or manicured- gloves can also help smooth out any sharpness of your nails and cuticles so accidental scratching is less likely, and makes for less mess when you’re lubing up or cleaning up.
Arousal is not only something that should be key for any kind of penetrative play, but it can also be a huge help in locating the prostate. The more turned on the person is, the more pronounced the prostate becomes – it will feel firmer behind the anal wall, almost like a walnut.
Since the p-spot is best reached through that curved movement, many people will use a technique of curling their fingers in a rhythmic “come hither” motion. Stroking the prostate with this motion with fingers or a toy is a super popular way to stimulate this area, or you might also like pressure, vibration, tapping, thrusting, or a rocking motion.
If an erection isn’t able to be kept during prostate play, don’t freak. It’s not uncommon for penises to lose their firmness while the anus is being stimulated – it’s less to do with levels of arousal and more to do with the blood flow moving towards the center of pleasure and stimulation.
Stroking of the prostate is often so pleasurable that it can cause clear prostatic fluid to drip from the urethra. In fact, orgasm can result from direct stimulation of the p-spot, which may lead to ejaculation regardless of erection.
Want to keep the energy going in the front and back? Try adding some oral play or a hand job, or even a hands-free wearable penis vibe while pleasuring that prostate! You may even have the honor of experiencing a blended orgasm – which is an orgasm that’s brought on by a combination of penis + prostate stimulation, and can feel totally different than one caused by one or the other.
Want to try out prostate play? Check out these educator picks for some p-spot pleasure:
